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The gift to create form, from the mist of imagination, is pure magic!


Saturday, June 26, 2021

Aadi Parashakti (1) - Chhinnamasta

 


12x16 inches; Watercolour, Pen and ink over graphite pencil on acid free textured paper (Click on image to enlarge) 

Imagine nature as the embodiment of feminine force - Naked, wild, untamed, nurturing and destructive at the same time. She has the power to create life, destroy it and create again, while providing nourishment throughout this cycle to herself and her creation. She can decide to turn lush forests into deserts and create an oasis in that desert. She can become the sea and engulf the land or push an island up in the middle of the sea. She is formed of air, wind, earth, fire and space and she also brings forth these elements from within her to create the universe. She is self sufficient and requires no one else to support her in this process. She is devoid of ego. She is devoid of shame. She is devoid of greed. She wants to conquer no one, and in turn can’t be conquered. She is limitless like the horizon and yet she is a grain of sand. She is the eternal cycle of birth, staying alive, feeding and procreating, death and ultimately decaying to feed other life. She is the universe and the universe is her creation. She seems to be chaos, the churning of contradictions through which she keeps the world in balance.

Imagine if she was given the form of a woman. That is exactly the form given to the ‘Dasa Mahavidya’ (10 cosmic wisdom) – of which ‘Chhinnamasta’ is one such goddess. What kind of threat would such a woman pose to the dominance of ‘man’? What kind of challenge she would pose to patriarchal control? This could be one of the main reasons why her worship became shrouded in secrecy and mystery. She was demonized, often deliberately to inspire fear. Women were discouraged to get initiated in her worship; for fear that they will become detached from the world of Maya and attain enlightenment, becoming ‘siddha’ yoginis or ‘Dakinis’ (in Buddhist and Hindu Tantric practice a Dakini is the female embodiment of enlightened energy). Dakinis are reputed to be fierce, demonic and uncontrollable – a clear case of demonization of women who have attained spiritual enlightenment through dedicated practice. Such women are a threat to the smooth workings of a patriarchal societal set up, where women should be tamed like cattle and immersed in making a family and sustaining it, while the men can immerse themselves in other worldly pursuits to satisfy their ego or to rise above it and answer to their spiritual awakening.

So, Chhinnamasta got restricted and reduced into the limiting ‘self –sacrificing’ mother figure, who epitomized ‘self-control’ of sexual desires for spiritual bliss. A shallow narrative of her vastness and depth is what has been normalized. I have started working on this series of ‘Aadi Parashakti’ (primordial supreme energy) wherein I want to explore Buddhist and Hindu Tantric  and Hindu Shakta Mythology, Spirituality, Philosophy, and Symbolism through a queer perspective which examines and questions the patriarchal conditioning imposed on such empowering narratives of the eternal feminine. I had created another painting of ‘Chhinnamasta’  and you can see it here – Chhinnamasta/Chhinnamastika and read more about this awe inspiring incarnation of ‘Shakti’.

Monday, June 21, 2021

We are Chhinnamasta

 

 (Click on image to enlarge)

 

2020 was a year of creative collaborations. Such collaborations were a respite from the depression and anxiety which the COVID-19 pandemic pushed us into, and also helped me to deal with the pain of losing a loved one.

It was the year I lost my mother. She had been confined to her bed for more than 6 years after she suffered a cerebral stroke. Her left side was paralyzed and she never recovered completely. She suffered another stroke in 2019 which left her in a comatose condition. She could only open her eyes and stare blankly at us all. Nothing more. We could not tell what was going on inside her. We did not know if she could hear us. Her body did not respond to touch. She was with us in this condition for nearly a year. She passed away on 23rd August.

During that time I got introduced to this wonderful human being, James Strazza through Instagram. James is a talented musician and poet, who is battling disability and chronic illness for a very long time and he has been mostly confined to his bed and room for most of his life. His creativity has kept him afloat. His poems are thick with raw emotions and deep thoughts. 

The struggle of my mother and James, their fight for survival provided me with strength and made me realize that the confinement I was facing due to the pandemic was a minor discomfort compared to what my Ma had to go through or James has to withstand every day. It made me painfully aware of my privileges and helped me to make peace with the emotional turmoil inside me.

All this was instrumental for me to revisit the theme of 'Chhinnamasta'. It was meant as an illustration for one of Jame's poems, for the book 'Lyrical' which is a collection of his poetry. But of course it evolved beyond that and became a symbolic representation of what the eternal mother was teaching me through all the pain and suffering. 

We are Chhinnamasta! Each one of us.

Wednesday, April 28, 2021

Mandragora

 




29.0 x 9.5 inches; Watercolour, pen and ink over graphite pencil on handmade paper (Click on image to enlarge)

 

Twilight in the park

Awakens the fireflies,

Liminal magical beings

Discard their shadows,

Glowing with urgent eyes

Desires that seek the dark.

 

A bush lightly trembles

Growing into life, lazily,

Like a long drawn yawn

Leaving your bed of leaves,

Flipping tousled head hazily

A smile tickling me crumbles.

 

The scent of pleasure

Conjures a potent embrace,

With promises of resurrection

Flowing in our excited veins,

Needy kisses drunkenly trace

The elixir we warily treasure.

 

Cracks open the shell

Bursting boils of repression,

Sighs escape turning us deaf

To screams in our tortured heads,

Grasping this moment of elation

Before hiding, back in our hell.

 

Monday, November 2, 2020

Criminal Culture (3) - Burn that 'Witch'

 






13.5x20.5 inches; Pen drawing on handmade paper with watercolour wash (Click on image to enlarge)

Joan of Arc was burnt on a pile of faggots by cowards proclaiming she was a witch. A woman who led an army to victory was murdered in a public spectacle because a few men in power felt threatened by her rising popularity and increasing power. Before she was killed, these cowards had her go through an inhuman virginity test. I often imagine what would have happened if Joan was actually a powerful witch? One thing is for sure, she would not have burnt on that pile of faggots!

In our country witches/hags (‘Daieni’ in Bangali, ‘Dayan’ in Hindi, ‘Mantragatte’ in Telegu and it has a equivalent term in each Indian language!) are paraded naked in the village, tied to a post/tree, beaten/stoned, raped and then killed by hanging, burnt alive or just beaten to death! Witches are primarily women (Not that Men can’t be witches, but they are more respected than the women. No surprises there). In the cities, witches mostly get to keep their life, but that can be worse than death! How do they identify witches? There are time tested pointers. If your mother or dies while giving birth to you, or anyone else in your family or neighbourhood dies at the time of your birth, you are immediately labelled as inauspicious and a witch. They will say, ‘The witch has devoured her mother at birth!’ This identity will not leave you all your life!

And then, if you are outspoken, you are a witch. If you are rebellious, you are a witch. If men find you attractive you are a witch (Of course you have done black magic on them. Or else who will look at you twice?) If you fall in love with a man and the man loves you back, you have trapped him in your dark magic - witch. If you reject the advances of a man, and that man is obsessed with you because he can’t get you, you are playing hard to get - witch. If that man harms himself because of your rejection, you drove him mad - witch. If the man you love becomes your husband, you seduced him - witch. If you have more than one man vying for your attention, you are a shameless - witch. If you are friendly with your husband’s friends, you are a temptress - witch. If your husband becomes ill, gets unlucky or dies, you cursed him - witch. If you are a spinster, you are a frustrated - witch. Anything bad happens to anyone who is related to you, you are a wrathful - witch. If your neighbourhood gets affected by a natural calamity, you are a demonic - witch. If your womb is dry, you are a barren - witch. If your husband is impotent, YOU are a barren - witch. If you are a career woman, you are a greedy and power hungry - witch. If you are lazy, you are a good for nothing - witch... You get the picture. Being a witch has much less to do with superstition and more to do with being born a girl. It also has a lot to do with class and caste related disadvantages!

You see, a woman born in a poor, lower caste household is already considered a curse (Not that the rich care much for women, but they do not have to worry about feeding another mouth or arranging dowry for the daughter when she needs to be married.) and if you are a woman who has a strong mind and an indomitable spirit, you become a threat to many including yourself, just like Joan of Arc. You become a threat to the power of men and other women who thrive in the shade of that power. And that is when you become a witch, because without magical and supernatural superpowers a woman cannot mange to stand with or against men, forget about leading men! We are the weaker sex, remember? So, we need to be witches to challenge authority and it also helps authority to demonize us as witches and deny us our human needs, be it our freedom, choice, consent, sexuality or desires. We are uprooted, torn apart, flung away and yet we survive. Like weed we grow in the decorated ‘Garden of Eden’. Some time posthumously we are made into a goddess like Yellamma, Matangi and Renuka; just how Joan was made a saint 489 years after she was burnt alive as a witch!

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Witch – meaning in slang

·         Anyone (mostly women) who practices witchcraft or black magic

·         A bitter or hateful woman (Also called Hag)

·         A woman who is old, ugly, unattractive and frigid

·         A woman who is very attractive to men

·         A woman who dominates men

·         A synonym for ‘Bitch’

Note: Also applicable to feminine homosexual men and transgender persons

‘Witch’ is a sexist/misogynist/classist/racist slur/insult used for

1.       Woman of colour (black/brown women and women of aboriginal descent)

2.       Woman of lower caste/class

3.       Woman who is credited with usually malignant supernatural powers earned by practicing black witchcraft often with the aid of a devil 

4.       Woman who is perceived to bring bad luck

5.       Woman who is confident of her sexuality and sexual allure

6.       Woman who is ugly and unattractive

7.       Woman who has outgrown her sexual utility or frigid

8.       Woman who is a threat to the power of men

Note: Also applicable to feminine homosexual men and transgender persons

It is interesting to note how the word ‘witch’ is used to denigrate both attractive and unattractive women; Attractive or unattractive to whom? Men, of course! So, the worth of women boils down to their utility as sex objects for men. If a woman knows that she is attractive, she becomes difficult to ‘own’. It is also easier to blame ‘black magic’ for getting involved in a sexual encounter with a woman just to satisfy one’s ‘lust’!  Hence demonizing her as a ‘witch’ makes these men salvage their own masculinity by passing the blame of their moral 'corruption' on to the ‘black magic’ she employed. On the other hand a woman, who is unattractive to men, remains out of control of men as they do not want to possess/own her. Hence she needs to be marginalized and demonized to be kept under control, lest she finds the lack of control empowering.

The word ‘witch’ is rooted in the history of labelling women, who threaten men’s power, as crazy or evil. Cultures that socially establish women in a disempowered position are more likely to demonize them as “evil” and accuse them “of witchcraft” when they try to empower themselves. According to the latest estimates, 45,000 people were executed for witchcraft in Early Modern Europe and Eighty percent of people charged with witchcraft in Early Modern Europe were women. Historians argue the witch hunt was a result of socioeconomic inequalities, envy, as a way to make sense of unexplainable tragedy, or the result of religious and political conflict. Religious misogyny and superstitions to keep women in control are the most common motives for murders in the guise of witch hunts.

‘According to India’s National Crime Records Bureau, more than 2500 people in India have been tortured and killed in these hunts between 2000 to 2016, most of them being women. However, people say that “number is much higher, because most states don’t list witchcraft as a motive of murder”. So there is no concrete number of people that have lost their lives to being accused of a witch. On average, an Indian woman is “killed every other day after being accused of witchcraft, according to government statistics”’ (Source – Link 1 for further reading)

Within the context of men’s control over women, the only power that women were perceived to possess was their sexuality and sexual agency to attract men. It is therefore apparent why feminine beauty is linked with witchcraft.

‘A number of terms that relate to women’s ability to appear desirable have magical connotations. Most obviously, a woman can be “bewitching” in her power to lure men. In addition, the word “glamour”, which we associate with stylish women, originally referred to the occult and a spell that made the viewer see an object or person differently to its actual appearance.’ (Source – Link 2 for further reading)

Women have begun to reclaim the word “witch” and transform the qualities it connotes into positive traits.

Popular misconception which is propagated in our society – A ‘Witch’ is hateful, vengeful, conniving, inauspicious and immoral along with being ‘anti orthodox religion'. Hence, they are utterly harmful and dangerous for everyone around them. They should be hunted down and treated as criminals. A ‘Witch’ needs to be exposed, judged and punished. A ‘Witch’ deserves punishment in the form of physical, verbal and psychological abuse - Domestic violence, torture, rape, public shaming, invasion of privacy, dehumanizing, curtailing support system and taking life - each one a criminal act against humanity.

For further reading:

Links:

1.       https://www.arcgis.com/apps/Cascade/index.html?appid=44f8a8cc132b4b76b8aedb8672580edf

2.       https://theconversation.com/witches-both-mad-and-bad-a-loaded-word-with-an-ugly-history-52804

3.       https://egrove.olemiss.edu/cgi/viewcontent.cgi?article=1722&context=hon_thesis

4.       https://www.thebetterindia.com/175301/witch-hunt-murder-crime-women-india/

5.       https://blog.ipleaders.in/witch-hunting-attacks-in-india/

Monday, October 12, 2020

Criminal Culture (2) – Hurt that ‘Slut’







13.5x20.5 inches; Pen drawing on handmade paper with watercolour wash (Click on image to enlarge) 

Love is a good excuse. You see, in this region, men have a lot of heat and we are always ready to have sex with girls (Woman sounds very... it has a not-a-virgin ring to it! Though many a times due to lack of options many desperate men will go to the red light area or satisfy their hunger with a hot bhabi (i) in the colony. But those cases are rare and much uncultured! And no, in our culture men don’t bang other men or Chhakkas (ii)! Disgraceful! Better poke a goat than commit such a sin!), but we do not always get the opportunity because good girls save their virginity for their husbands. So, what should we men do? How long can we depend on our own hands to release our heat? And you can’t get married to every girl you fancy just for masti (iii). That’s when love comes handy.

“How?” you ask. Let me explain then. I am an able bodied, unmarried, virile man (For men age does not matter, what matters is whether we can get ‘it’ up!) and handsome (Won’t you agree?). So, first I select a girl. I set my eyes on this fair, young, curvaceous item number (Such big assets (iv)!), who comes to my shop regularly to buy supplies and often looks at me and smiles coyly. I get a feeling that she is ripe for plucking. I start to spin my web around her. Give her discounts, free gifts...you know the drill. Then one day, when she has a big load to carry back home, I offer to drop her home on my Yamaha. You understand right? It is like killing two birds with the same stone. I get to impress her with my motorbike and I get to feel her body press against my back during the ride! Clever, no? I can’t tell you how many times I shook my wand that night, just remembering the feeling of her melon like boobs pressing against my back! I already knew where she lived, the daughter of our old postmaster!

So, I start working my charm and it takes me five whole months to make her believe that I love her and I will marry her! That’s the magic promise. Then she does what I want, and dances to the tune of my flute like a drunk Nagin (v)! A virgin one that too! What a catch! For the next couple of months, my hands get time off from shaking my wand! She burns with every touch of mine and asks for it again and again. I still get hot thinking about it. So, mission accomplished.  I get to bang a virgin with just three magic words ‘I Love You!’ Now you understand?

What happened after that? Well, she started nagging me to marry her, every time we met. I made excuses. I never intended to marry her, right? That arrangement was working out fine for me. I always used a condom, so she can’t blackmail me with pregnancy! I am clever, I tell you.

It gets boring after that. How can I, an eligible bachelor with a profitable business and loads of money, marry a girl whose father lives on government salary? What dowry will she fetch? It would have been something if they owned any property, but they lived in a government quarter. And why marry just for masti when there were other flowers to pluck in the garden? And moreover she proved to be a ‘Slut’. I used and tasted her already. If she was a girl of virtue she would have protected her honour and virginity and insisted that I marry her before jumping into bed with me. But she was too easy! I want my wife to be a virgin on our wedding night, untouched by any man. It was a no deal!  So, I dumped her. Oh she did such drama, but then I reminded her that I have some of her ‘khul-ja-simsim’(vi) photos with me and if she acted too smart, I will make them public. That took her off my back! But what hot sex I had as long as it lasted. She could give Sunny Leone a run for her money, boss! Those photographs I have of her, serve their purpose well, even today (Wink!).

What became of her? Well, the ‘Slut’ got what she deserved (I can’t stand ‘Sluts’ you know!). She was married off in a hurry to a government clerk from the neighbouring district. On the wedding night Mister found out Missus was not a virgin! He beat the ‘Slut’ black and blue and two days later dumped her back at her father’s house. If you ask me, she got away easy! If I come to know my wife is a ‘Slut’, on my wedding night, I will hurt her so bad that I will kill her after I take all the pleasure from her. Soon, the entire family left this neighbourhood, quietly in the night, like thieves. No news after that.

What about me? I am still single, buzzing around drinking nectar from different flowers in the garden. If you know of a good, virgin, young girl, from a rich business family, fix her up with me. I will reward you with those photos of the ‘Slut’.

(i) Brother’s wife

(ii) Slang for Hijras/eunuchs

(iii) Sexual pleasure

(iv) Refers to the physical attributes of the girl, namely her breasts, hips and ass.

(v) Female snake

(vi) Refers to ‘Open sesame’ indicating revealing/naked pictures

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 Slut – meaning in slang

~ A dirty, slovenly woman (Rarely used nowadays)

~ A servant girl or a slave (Classist and racist origins)

 An immoral woman

~ A female sex worker

~ A person who is sexually promiscuous (Mostly used for women but also used for homosexual/bisexual men and transgender persons)

~ A person with excessive desire to do or have something specific

Slut is a sexist/misogynist/classist/racist slur/insult used for

1.       Woman of colour (more often for black/brown women)

2.       Woman with multiple sexual partners

3.       Sex worker

4.       Homosexual/bisexual man and transgender person who is promiscuous

5.       Woman who is aware of her sexuality and sexual agency and uses it with confidence

6.        A woman who uses sex to get benefits, jobs or promotions (work place)

7.       Women/men as sex slaves

There is no equivalent derogatory term which can be used to describe a sexually promiscuous heterosexual man. The terms like stud, player and womanizer are used in a rather pompous manner to applaud male promiscuity as big achievement. This exposes the double standards of society’s moral codes set for men and women.

Feminists and LGBTQ rights movements have reclaimed the word ‘Slut’ and use it with pride, denoting that promiscuity is nothing to be ashamed of. Psychoanalyst and social critic Susie Orbach says, “The problem with the word slut is that it has cut women off because they have energy around their sexual desires and we are still so prejudiced about this. But if we reclaim the word, it simply becomes an issue of 'so what?'." The SlutWalk movement which has gained considerable ground also establishes this along with protest against the idea that a woman's appearance, often considered promiscuous, is a justification of inviting sexual assault and rape. The participants in these walks protest against individuals that excuse rape due to the woman's appearance, including victim blaming and slut shaming.

Popular misconception which is propagated in our society – A ‘Slut’ is not worthy of any dignity or human decency and hence can be dealt with in the basest ways. A ‘Slut’ promotes immorality through sexual abandon and hence destroys the virtuous family-centrist fabric of society. A ‘Slut’ needs to be policed, rehabilitated, restrained and punished. A ‘Slut’ deserves punishment in the form of physical, verbal and psychological abuse - Domestic violence, torture, rape, public shaming, invasion of privacy, dehumanizing, curtailing support system and taking life - each one a criminal act against humanity.

For further reading:

Links:

1.  https://www.bbc.com/news/magazine-13333013

2.  https://link.springer.com/article/10.1007/s11199-019-01095-z

3. https://www.huffpost.com/entry/why-you-should-stop-using-the-word-slut-as-an-insult-the-story-of-emily-lindins-unslut-project_b_6715534

4. https://ling.yale.edu/sites/default/files/files/alumni%20senior%20essays/Scruton_Eliza%20Senior%20Essay%20Final.pdf