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The gift to create form, from the mist of imagination, is pure magic!


Saturday, June 26, 2021

Aadi Parashakti (1) - Chhinnamasta

 


12x16 inches; Watercolour, Pen and ink over graphite pencil on acid free textured paper (Click on image to enlarge) 

Imagine nature as the embodiment of feminine force - Naked, wild, untamed, nurturing and destructive at the same time. She has the power to create life, destroy it and create again, while providing nourishment throughout this cycle to herself and her creation. She can decide to turn lush forests into deserts and create an oasis in that desert. She can become the sea and engulf the land or push an island up in the middle of the sea. She is formed of air, wind, earth, fire and space and she also brings forth these elements from within her to create the universe. She is self sufficient and requires no one else to support her in this process. She is devoid of ego. She is devoid of shame. She is devoid of greed. She wants to conquer no one, and in turn can’t be conquered. She is limitless like the horizon and yet she is a grain of sand. She is the eternal cycle of birth, staying alive, feeding and procreating, death and ultimately decaying to feed other life. She is the universe and the universe is her creation. She seems to be chaos, the churning of contradictions through which she keeps the world in balance.

Imagine if she was given the form of a woman. That is exactly the form given to the ‘Dasa Mahavidya’ (10 cosmic wisdom) – of which ‘Chhinnamasta’ is one such goddess. What kind of threat would such a woman pose to the dominance of ‘man’? What kind of challenge she would pose to patriarchal control? This could be one of the main reasons why her worship became shrouded in secrecy and mystery. She was demonized, often deliberately to inspire fear. Women were discouraged to get initiated in her worship; for fear that they will become detached from the world of Maya and attain enlightenment, becoming ‘siddha’ yoginis or ‘Dakinis’ (in Buddhist and Hindu Tantric practice a Dakini is the female embodiment of enlightened energy). Dakinis are reputed to be fierce, demonic and uncontrollable – a clear case of demonization of women who have attained spiritual enlightenment through dedicated practice. Such women are a threat to the smooth workings of a patriarchal societal set up, where women should be tamed like cattle and immersed in making a family and sustaining it, while the men can immerse themselves in other worldly pursuits to satisfy their ego or to rise above it and answer to their spiritual awakening.

So, Chhinnamasta got restricted and reduced into the limiting ‘self –sacrificing’ mother figure, who epitomized ‘self-control’ of sexual desires for spiritual bliss. A shallow narrative of her vastness and depth is what has been normalized. I have started working on this series of ‘Aadi Parashakti’ (primordial supreme energy) wherein I want to explore Buddhist and Hindu Tantric  and Hindu Shakta Mythology, Spirituality, Philosophy, and Symbolism through a queer perspective which examines and questions the patriarchal conditioning imposed on such empowering narratives of the eternal feminine. I had created another painting of ‘Chhinnamasta’  and you can see it here – Chhinnamasta/Chhinnamastika and read more about this awe inspiring incarnation of ‘Shakti’.

Monday, June 21, 2021

We are Chhinnamasta

 

 (Click on image to enlarge)

 

2020 was a year of creative collaborations. Such collaborations were a respite from the depression and anxiety which the COVID-19 pandemic pushed us into, and also helped me to deal with the pain of losing a loved one.

It was the year I lost my mother. She had been confined to her bed for more than 6 years after she suffered a cerebral stroke. Her left side was paralyzed and she never recovered completely. She suffered another stroke in 2019 which left her in a comatose condition. She could only open her eyes and stare blankly at us all. Nothing more. We could not tell what was going on inside her. We did not know if she could hear us. Her body did not respond to touch. She was with us in this condition for nearly a year. She passed away on 23rd August.

During that time I got introduced to this wonderful human being, James Strazza through Instagram. James is a talented musician and poet, who is battling disability and chronic illness for a very long time and he has been mostly confined to his bed and room for most of his life. His creativity has kept him afloat. His poems are thick with raw emotions and deep thoughts. 

The struggle of my mother and James, their fight for survival provided me with strength and made me realize that the confinement I was facing due to the pandemic was a minor discomfort compared to what my Ma had to go through or James has to withstand every day. It made me painfully aware of my privileges and helped me to make peace with the emotional turmoil inside me.

All this was instrumental for me to revisit the theme of 'Chhinnamasta'. It was meant as an illustration for one of Jame's poems, for the book 'Lyrical' which is a collection of his poetry. But of course it evolved beyond that and became a symbolic representation of what the eternal mother was teaching me through all the pain and suffering. 

We are Chhinnamasta! Each one of us.